Reviewed by
Linda Wanfried

Dads have a special perspective, and when they are actively involved with their children's' lives, it can be so personally enriching for them as well as their children. However, dads are not always "in up to their elbows", that is helping actually do the therapies.

This dad is right in there. Working with the Higashi School's approach to educating their son, Dad and Jordan made exercise a big part of their daily program. They exercised together every day. They jogged and they swam. Jordan eventually was sent to the Higashi School in Japan. Can you imagine sending your baby that far?

I found it fascinating as dad related how he and his wife came to the decision, and how they and Jordan lived through this period. In addition to relating the details of what they have tried with Jordan, Dad also chronicles his emotions. We read about Dad's feelings as the family struggles along. It is with a deep sense of gratitude that I recommend this book. Thanks for writing it, Craig!

This family story of perseverance, love and true grit will be familiar and yet also amazing to those of us in this exclusive "club". The effort the Schulzes have expended in terms of educating themselves and pursuing various treatments for their Jordan is heroic. Many of us will feel a kinship with this family as they struggle along trying many therapies in an effort to help their Jordan. Here is a passage from the book that I particularly liked: "The camaraderie of these outings makes me realize for the first time the potential for developing special relationships with other members of families with handicapped children, once the pain of having such a child begins to subside. Even after one has become accustomed to the experience, so much of the day-to-day life with an autistic child can seem like purgatory: but developing this kind of soul-mate friendship crystallizes the meaning of Dante's vision that the love of God informs the universe even to the depths of hell. It has been almost five years since we have had such comfortable fellowship with another family over an extended period of time; and this lack of familial friendship seems, in retrospect, to have been one of the worst elements of our ordeal. Our friendship with the N's also represents the first time since we've known Jordan was autistic that we have felt appreciated for what we could bring to a friendship. During our get together, I am, at times, reminded of all the isolation that Jill and I felt during those initial months - no, years- when even our friends and relatives became estranged from us because of our special circumstance. Looking back on that long period of disconnectedness brings home very clearly how having this kind of a relationship may be the sine qua non of mental health; and, given the rarity and unyielding nature of the disorder, it is easy to understand why so many parents of autistic children are chronically depressed. For the opportunity to find others with whom you can give and obtain counsel may never present itself."

This piece was especially poignant to me. My husband and I, like many other parents, have searched for other families who have gone through experiences similar to ours, whose child may be "kind of like" ours. Naturally that search for a "like" child is futile. But we have found that connecting with other parents of children with autism and other disabilities is a great source of understanding and companionship.

But where are you going to find them? At the monthly Autism Society meetings -- so come on out!